July 2, 2019

Everyone has heard of mindfulness, and we generally see it as a tool for coping with everyday stressors, such as work, interpersonal dynamics, and other pressures. But few people apply it to their sex lives.

Mindfulness can turn mediocre sex into mind-blowing sex, and it can, in some cases, help improve problems of either premature ejaculation or lack of libido. Research shows that mindfulness can increase sexual desire.

In cases of sexual dysfunction, practicing presence can also mean you get more enjoyment from sexual intimacy purely by being ‘in the moment’, regardless of whether you reach a climax or not.

So instead of worrying about how to last longer in bed, you can relax and enjoy where you are, tuning into closeness and physical sensations.

Premature ejaculation becomes less of an issue as you and your partner can still enjoy the physical and mental sensations of intimacy both before and after the climax.

Practice Practice Practice

Mindfulness is something a lot of people pay lip service to, but it’s a skill that needs to be worked at by disciplining the mind and following up with lots of practice by applying it to all areas of your life.

Mindfulness doesn’t have to be something you use when you feel stressed and out of balance; it’s great for when you’re having fun, helping you to truly enjoy the experience, and of course, this translates very well to bedroom activities too.

The five Senses

The five senses exercise is a common practice to help you work on mindfulness.

At any moment in the day, stop for a few seconds and focus on each of your sensesby asking yourself:

  • What do I see right now?
  • What can I taste right now?
  • What sounds am I noticing right now?
  • What sensation is on my skin right now?
  • What can I smell right now?

Practice this every day whenever you can. Then try to bring this same practice into your sex life.


Meditation is a great daily practice to adopt if you want to enhance your mindful skills even further. Even five minutes of quietly sitting counts as meditation and can have advantages.

Here are some tips if you are new to meditation:

  • Don’t expect your mind to go blank and don’t fight your thoughts; even the Dalai Lama will experience the ‘monkey mind’ occasionally.
  • Find something to focus on. This can be on your breathing or relaxing meditation music, or you can sit with eyes open focusing on the flame of a burning candle.
  • Try to view your thoughts as if you were an observer.
  • Thoughts will come and go. When you notice your mind running on (starting to plan the day, ruminating over yesterday, etc.), gently try and bring yourself back to the present.

More insights on sexual health

  • Superfoods that Help with Bedroom Performance

    23 Mar 2020

    10 Superfoods that Help with Bedroom Performance

    If you’re looking for ways to improve your performance in the bedroom, it’s time to turn your attention to your diet. As it turns out, there is significant evidence to …

  • mindfulness for sex

    2 Jul 2019

    How Mindfulness can Blow Your Mind in The Bedroom

    Mindfulness can turn mediocre sex into mind-blowing sex, and it can, in some cases, help improve problems of either premature ejaculation or lack of libido. Research shows that mindfulness can …

  • Why Sex is Good For You

    2 Jul 2019

    6 Reasons Why Sex is Good For You

    There is a plethora of good evidence that shows that regular sexual activity positively affects your health by changing some physiological functions in the body.

  • Erectile-Dysfunction

    27 Jun 2019

    Is Stress A Leading Cause of ED?

    As you get older your risk of Erectile Dysfunction (ED) increases, but having trouble holding an erection isn’t something that is just related to age. Many men will, …

  • Low Male Sex Drive

    2 Jun 2019

    Low Male Sex Drive – What You Need to Know

    Having a low sex drive can be a major source of depression and anxiety for many men. But what causes it and what can you do about it?…

  • How-drugs-and-alcohol-affect-your-performance-640x470

    2 Apr 2019

    How Drugs and Alcohol Affect Your Performance

    Dutch courage is a popular phrase. Alcohol lifts your inhibitions, which is why it’s often described (and used) as a social lubricant. In small amounts, it can help …